Boundaries Show Love

Dear Soul Sister,

I’m sitting here with a fever, a throbbing headache, and a bitter tasting cup of tea, and I'm reminded of the fine line between self care and the obligations we feel towards the ones we love, especially during the holiday season.

Two days ago, I had planned to host Christmas dinner for my entire family. The house was ready, the menu was set with food prepared, and my heart was full of joy and anticipation. But, life, in its unpredictable manner (and Mercury retrograde if you ask me), decided to throw a major curveball. My daughter woke up on Christmas morning with a fever and feeling under the weather. It was a tough call, but I had to cancel the much-awaited gathering.

In that moment, I was full of emotions. No one wants to spend Christmas isolated, away from the warmth and laughter of family and friends. And true to form, a few of my relatives, “bless their little hearts”, still wanted to come over and share the meal. They meant well, but this was a time for me to enforce a boundary, not just for my well-being but for theirs as well.

This experience brought home a vital lesson: the importance of setting boundaries. Boundaries are not just lines drawn in the sand to keep others out; they are also a form of self-respect and care. They communicate to ourselves and the world how we expect to be treated.

In canceling the Christmas dinner, I wasn't just protecting my health; I was also demonstrating to my loved ones that it's okay to put yourself first sometimes. It's okay to say no, to step back, and to take care of your own needs. This act of self-care is crucial, not just for our physical well-being, but for our mental and emotional health too.

Self-care isn't a luxury; it's a necessity. It's the fuel that powers our ability to care for others. If we don't prioritize our health and well-being, how can we be there for the ones we love? How can we pour from an empty cup?

So, as you navigate the post-Christmas period and the upcoming new year, I encourage you to reflect on your own boundaries and self-care practices. Are you taking enough time for yourself? Are you setting healthy boundaries, not just with others but with yourself as well? Remember, setting boundaries is a sign of strength, not weakness. It's a testament to your self-awareness and your commitment to living.

Love Always,

Coach Lori